Jesus Is Not Your Friend

There has been some confusion lately regarding radical feminism and Christian conservatives.

It dawned on me recently why it’s all so hard to clear up on our end. But, once in a while, I meet a liberal Christian.

Girl Let Me Tell You

Sure, he’s a sweet talker, but wait till you hear what he’s done!

Liberal Christians are the ones who try to square believing what Jesus said – About the meek inheriting the earth and all that – with what their religion actually teaches.

They’re the ones who will slip into a loud whisper while reminding you that Jesus hung out with lepers, prostitutes and losers. The huddled masses yearning to breathe free were kinda his thing, really, and if someone tried to convince me the US was a Christian nation on those grounds, I might listen.

Regardless how you feel about him, Jesus was still a man. The faith has always been run by men and they have not wasted words letting us know how they feel about us, BC or AD.

A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to assume authority over a man, she must be quiet.” – 1 Timothy 2:11-12

When exactly should I stop giving my son advice? His first chin hair? Graduation? High school, or college? When exactly does someone become an adult these days? I’m 37 and still waiting.

It doesn’t matter anyway, this religion is not interested in anything we have to say:If they will learn anything,” Oh, I see what you did there, “let them ask their husbands at home. For it is a shame for women to speak in the church.” – 1 Corinthians 14:35

I sure hope the bathroom is easy to find…

Despite low expectations, I was surprised how much material I found. There’s even, a fascinating blog by a lay preacher that’s the most informative train wreck imaginable. Just in case there’s still any confusion after all these years about what they expect of us.

Little Girl And Leopard

He would never hurt me, he’s such a pussy cat!

It’s more of the same. Jesus is not our friend.

Testifying for bills we support, or accepting media slots when no one else will let us speak, is as far as any of us should go. Ongoing alliances give energy to one group of people it doesn’t feel like an exaggeration to call oppressive.

If we align ourselves with them in any material way, we will regret it. Jesus is not our friend, and most people don’t actually listen to him, anyway. I appreciate the few who do, y’all should get a different name for yourselves.

Call it whatever you want, modern religion was founded on controlling women and only pays lip service to making amends. So a female priest can recite for me the ultimate princess fantasy – All I really need is the right man, and his name is Jesus.

I believe what we need doesn’t exist yet, in so many ways. We’re not going to get there by running back into the waiting arms of the most famous patriarch in the world.

Donald Trump’s Spiritual Advisor is A Satanist

More specifically, a hedonist. And a total maniac. It’s spit-take-worthy irony that she would pray for the abortion of “satanic pregnancies.”

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

On A Broomstick

Allow me to compose myself!

Even the most casual of Christians will be familiar with Jesus’ messages of charity and peace. Heal the sick, the meek shall inherit the earth, all that. These things are central to the popular idea of his character.

It’s not one of my favorite stories, but I can see how some people find good things in it.

Then, there’s Prosperity Doctrine.

These people believe that God shows his favor through material wealth.

And they talk about Jesus




It’s pretty obscene, even to me.

Now, one of these bizarro-Christians has snaked her way into the White House. The ultimate expression of the unholy alliance between the conservative party and the Christian Right.

Paula White is not there by accident, either. This woman has a nose for power. She has a history of discarding people who hold her back. “Leeches,” as she calls them. She won’t be cowed by such “demonic” forces.

Doctors have erased the lines of a face that has seen abuse and death. The suicide of her father colored her childhood, and she has become a woman who takes fate into her own hands.

Paula White

Maleficent irl

At first glance, what Paula says sounds a lot like the Manifestation stuff that’s going around. “Make your world with your words!

Okay, sure. “Where I walk,” Ms. White has famously said, “God walks.

Hey, she’s a televangelist. These people are literally just con artists who prey on the mentally and financially challenged. They say some crazy shit in pursuit of this morally repugnant goal.

But Paula takes it that final step. “I am Divinity.”

“When I walk on White House grounds, God walks on White House grounds.”

“Anyone who tells you to deny yourself is from Satan.

Hold up. This is literally exactly what Satanists believe.

Halloween Fun

We might as well have a good time, no one gets out alive!

In my meanderings through philosophy, I happened to read the Satanic Bible. Written by a carnie, its lack of pretense is endearing.

Not to be confused with the angry Christians who worship the evil Demi-god of that religion called Satan. Those people are Big-C Crazy.

No, The Church of Satan preaches that we are all the divine spark in our own lives. They reject the notion of being “saved” from life, choosing to embrace this earthly plane. Much of which Christianity deems “evil.”

Thus, the inversion of that – The Church of Satan. It’s a pun, or something.

But whereas Christianity preaches asceticism (the rejection of earthly delights) hedonistic ideas focus on making the most of the here and now.

The Church of Satan blatantly states, “Our position is to be self-centered, with ourselves being the most important person (the “God”) of our subjective universe, so we are sometimes said to worship ourselves.


Paula says, “I have every right and authority to declare the White House holy ground, because I was standing there and where I stand is holy.”

American Christianity would seem to have thought its way clear through the wall it built between itself and the barbaric past it was reacting against. From the outside looking in, this is almost kind of funny.

Except that these people are not wrong. There is a creative force that each of us possesses, we use it to build our lives for better or worse. Paula White is, for lack of a better term, an evil witch.

And she is not alone. Prosperity Doctrine is booming in America. It’s some sick shit.

She Devil

Don’t mind the tentacles, darling!

These people focus on amplifying their creative energy to spread lies and enrich themselves. I don’t use religious (nor, certainly, magical!) terminology lightly, although I may not believe these things myself.

Satanists are not evil. Their website declares, “Satan to us is a symbol of pride, liberty and individualism, and it serves as an external metaphorical projection of our highest personal potential. We do not believe in Satan as a being or person.

Paula White is evil. She asks for thousands of dollars in “seed money” from people who have to take out loans to send it to her. And tells them doing this will buy favor with God.

“There is a department of treasury in Heaven, which says God is watching over everything you do and you are storing up eternal treasure that will go so far beyond what we can even imagine … you need to send in $3,500; you need to send in $35,000; you need to send in that $100,000 check.”

Did you get that?

Buy favor with God.

For whom she speaks, naturally.

I guess I’ll be seeing Ms. White with all the other heretics someday. She is a hypocrite of the highest order – Preaching the exact opposite of the religion she based her career on – But she’s also just plain evil. In the gross, sad way that preys on the elderly.

And this is the spiritual advisor to the President of the United States.


Hey, America! The call is coming from inside the house, honey!

This quote I found in Newsweek illustrates her conflation of physical and metaphysical, of Church and State: “We are scaring the literal hell out of demonic spirits…. If we get two more [Supreme Court justices], we will be able to overturn demonic laws and decrees that have held this nation in captivity.”

If you are considering voting for this man, please look at what you would be endorsing. I know we all want to pretend it’s 2000 forever, but the stakes have gotten real.

We have a party which proposes healthcare for poor people

Versus a party that believes being poor means God hates you.

These are the broader values going here. Do you stand with Jesus? With the meek? With the huddled masses of all colors and creeds who built this damn country? With the spirit of prosperity through cooperation that supposedly animates the American Experiment?

We can’t let these crazy people control our country. Paula White is a narcissistic maniac and these people are telling Trump that he is God.

“To say no to President Trump would be to say no to God.”

This is not gonna go well.